History has been made by people who faced mental illness. With their greatness came suffering. The ages would remember how they fought for the collective good. These were not perfect people, but they kept going in spite of their suffering. Just when they thought that they could go no further, they took one more step. Oftentimes they failed, and other times they didn't. In spite of their personal pain they kept going, inspiring others to do the same. Their greatness came from overcoming obstacles, not avoiding them. We too are destined for greatness, but our journey will not be free from struggle either. In fact it may be harder than it is easy. There is a greatness in each one of us that needs to be acknowledged, that yearns to be loved--a deep knowing that we have inside of us. We reach inward for the wisdom that is ours. As we reach out for hope, we let go of fear. We are part of something greater than ourselves. This life is about you and me finding our way back home--where we began with our perfect self.
Hope is what I hang onto when everything else tells me to let go. And it's easy to forget there's hope when you're going through hell. I'm living proof that hope is worth believing. All of the suffering I've experienced has prepared me for the present moment.
It feels like change is in the air - I'm seeing smoke signals everywhere. 2,000 high school students elected to attend my presentation at Bozeman High School. While attendance was not mandatory, students led the way by embracing a message of hope and human connection inspiring each other to be there. They were an amazing audience and the connection in the room was tangible. What a great kick-off to a Spring full of schools. I am excited to connect with students and staff at schools across the state as the Montana Schools Tour begins again. The Montana Schools Tour is presented by the Montana Office of Public Instruction, Blue Cross and Blue Shield of Montana, and the Burlington Northern Santa Fe Railway Foundation. The tour is sponsored by the Center for Mental Health Research and Recovery at Montana State University, and the Gilhousen Family Foundation.
The night sky is filled with stars, so there is light amidst the darkness. We too are called to shine. The simplest act of love transcends the insecurity of hate. Fear is only formidable until it is replaced with understanding. Compassion dismantles discrimination because it speaks to the heart and quiets the mind. Confusion exists in the world so that we can respond with love. Truth is absolute strength and it is on the side of those who seek it. It is in each one of us to do good. In a world that is not sane, we must find peace in our humanity. Every human being has inherent value and is worthy of love. The connection we share with one another helps us realize why we are here. We are in this together, part of something greater than ourselves. The moon holds court among the stars, illuminating us all. Into hopeful darkness, light shines indiscriminately. Tonight, the answers to the world's problems are found in our hearts, not in our heads. © Jason DeShaw, All Rights Reserved, 10/09/2017
I just returned home from the East Coast. I performed at Harvard's McLean Hospital for clinicians and researchers. I also went to New York City to meet up with Glenn Close and see her perform in her Broadway play, Sunset Boulevard. It was a stunning performance! She is an amazing person as is her sister, Jessie, and nephew, Calen. Now I prepare for a busy spring of touring. I hope to see you out on the road.
I was a little reluctant to share about my struggles in my hometown. In a small town you care about what other people think of you. Yesterday, I put that aside hoping to make a difference in Plentywood, Montana. Three other high schools also came to the event. The students were amazing, as was the entire experience. I received the following message from one of the students: "Thank you so much for coming to our school. You made me realize that I am not alone. You gave me purpose." I finally feel at home, in my hometown.
This past week I had the honor of performing at Montana State Hospital in Warm Springs. This was my fourth visit to the hospital to speak about hope and recovery. Oftentimes psychiatric hospitals don't get many visitors. It is a privilege to sing there and to see some of the patients I've come to know. It is a powerful experience to tell them that they have value, just for being. To say that they are enough, as is. We all have a sacred right to exist. No matter where we are or what we've done. Love is always the answer.
In spite of the blues, I keep on rolling. I'm preparing for a busy fall between the Montana Schools Tour and other performances. In between schools I'll be in New York City, Illinois, Canada, Washington, and Nevada. I'm ready for it. It seems like I do better when I stay busy. Mostly, I'm just glad to get out there and see some good come out of all this struggle. If one life is made better by my work, then it's all worth it.
It has been a while since I posted an update on here. In the months of January and February I left town to get a new form of treatment for depression called Deep TMS. I was slated to begin an 18-school tour across Montana in late March, but life or the universe had different plans. 40 days ago I was diagnosed with liver failure due to an over the counter medication. The doctors said it would take 3-months to recover, but I am beating those odds. It has been a spiritually awakening journey as most things are that bring us to the brink. And, as I said, I am still alive and kicking and loving life. We had to move the schools tour to the fall, but I will be hitting the road towards the end of April to spread the word again. All my very best and keep on hangin' on!
I recently performed at a Montana high school and was amazed by the experience. There were nearly 600 students in the audience in addition to staff and teachers. I've never had a more attentive audience; they were totally in tune with every word I spoke and every song I sang. Their school counselor messaged me the next day saying, "We have had a flood of students coming into our office telling us that 'if Jason DeShaw can talk about his depression, then I can talk about mine.' These were kids reaching out for help that no one knew was suffering." We are all in this together. We all play a part. I am so blessed to play mine.